Saturday, December 16, 2023

My Late-Night Hookup with Lou Ferrigno

When I was living in West Hollywood, I worked part-time as an editorial assistant on Muscle and Fitness.  

It wasn't as much fun as it sounds.  The articles were often heterosexist, we featured female bodybuilders as often as male, and  I didn't get to actually watch many photo shoots.

But I did get to meet a lot of bodybuilders, including Lou Ferrigno, Mr. America, Mr. Universe, "Hercules," and "The Incredible Hulk"

One day he came in with Bill Bixby, his "Hulk" co-star.  I thought they looked like a gay couple.

A few days later, he came in by himself for a photo shoot.

"Hi, Mr. Ferrigno." I called.  "Where's Bill?"

"I left him home, chained up in the basement."

"Can I come take a look?"

He grinned, clapped a huge hand on my back, and walked on.

A couple of weeks later, I had coffee with Jack Colvin, who played his nemesis on "Hulk."  He told me "Ferrigno is straight, but he won't say no to a late-night blow job."

I kept a lookout for Ferrigno's next appearance.  It came near Halloween, when I was working reception, a part of the job I hated.

"You got a promotion, I see," he said with a cruisy smile.

"I'm a jack of all trades around here, but usually I'm in editorial."

"Then be sure to spell my name right."

"Only if you spell mine right.  I'd better write it down for you."

He didn't object, so I wrote it on a piece of paper.  "And my phone number, in case you have any questions."

"Good idea.  I might have questions."

He put the number in his pocket and went off to his appointment.  About half an hour later, he came through the lobby again and stopped at my desk.  "Do you like ____?"

I didn't understand his deaf accent (Ferrigno has 80% hearing loss).  "Mexican food?"  Was he asking me out?  "Sure.  What time...."

Then someone else came in, and he mouthed "I'll call you," and left.

At least that's what I think he said.

I told all my friends that I had a date with Lou Ferrigno, and waited for his call.

It never came.  I started dating Alan the Pentecostal Porn Star, and forgot about it -- I was giving my phone number to a lot of people at the time.

Then one night in  January shortly after Alan and I broke up, I was at home, watching tv and doing my Italian homework, when Lou knocked on my door!

"Is this a good time?"

My one-room apartment was a mess -- unmade bed, dinner dishes out, books and papers everywhere.  Besides, I was in my bathrobe, and I hadn't brushed my teeth since dinner. But who's going to say no?

He collapsed onto the bed.  "Boy, I'm tired.  I could use a nap."

"Ok, let's take a nap."

I climbed onto the bed next to him, and he wrapped a huge arm around me.  I moved up and started unbuttoning his shirt and kissing his chest.

"That's nice," he murmured.  He held me tighter -- so tight I couldn't move.  I heard snoring.

Oh, well, lying in a muscular man's arms is one of the great joys of life.

We lay there for about ten minutes, while I caressed Lou's chest and belly, felt his bicep, and pressed his crotch.  No arousal.

"Go downtown," Lou murmured, his eyes still closed.

He released his grip so I could move down to his cock.  It took awhile for him to get aroused, but it was worth it -- about 7", very thick, uncut, mushroom head.

"Lick my balls," he murmured.  "That always lights my fire."

So I licked and sucked his balls while masturbating him, just going down on him in time to take his load.  Then Lou wrapped me into a hug again.  He wouldn't kiss.

"I don't kiss, sorry  But that was nice.  Guys do it better than girls."

I lay back against Lou's chest, feeling guilty.  Tricking, sex without going out on a date first, was unheard of in West Hollywood, unless you were a druggie or a sleazoid.  I could never tell my friends about this...unless I could salvage it with a date.

I"Um...about that Mexican food?"

"I have to look at you to hear you," Lou said.

I brought my face up to his.  "Mexican food?  Or Greek?  I know a good place in Hollywood....not tonight of course, but I'm free on Thursday."

"Sorry, I'm busy.  Got a thing with the wife."

"Wife?" I repeated in shock.  [He had been married to his second wife since 1980, and had two children.]

"Don't worry, she knows.  Well, I got to go."  He stood and ambled toward the door.  "I'll call you, ok?"

And he was gone.

I was mortified.  Not only had I tricked, I had helped a guy cheat on his partner, the same thing I broke up with Alan for!  I felt used, manipulated, unclean, like I needed a shower.  Besides, he hadn't touched my cock.  I was still horny.

No more late-night "Is this a good time?" visits from Lou Ferrigno, or anyone else.

Turns out that I didn't need to worry.  I saw Ferrigno at Muscle and Fitness and bodybuilding expos several times after that, and he always clapped a hand on my shoulder and said "Hi, buddy," but he never came to my apartment again.

I've heard a few more Lou Ferrigno hookup stories, but not many, maybe because he was not a major tv star, practically unknown to generations that grew up after The Incredible Hulk.  Tom Selleck or Sylvester Stallone were more familiar.

Or maybe because the evenings together were just "booty calls."  The term hadn't been invented yet, but that's what they were.


6 comments:

  1. The term "booty call" hadn't been invented yet, but that's what Lou's late-night visit was about.

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  2. You're probably wondering how Ferrigno got my address, when I just gave him my phone number and he showed up without calling. I didn't ask. Maybe he got it from somebody at the magazine.

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  3. Sounds like a typical straight but open-minded married guy. You won't get much farther than blowing him.

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  4. "She knows." Can I get her telling me in person of her approval, Lou?

    There's actually a whole underground gay scene with athletes, pro wrestlers, and bodybuilders. No one wants to suck or be fucked, so it's mostly mutual masturbation, frot, or interfemoral, but sometimes they'll use (and that is the best word for it, emotional attachments are to be avoided) a willing mouth.

    Bear in mind, this is an option for mismatched libido WITH YOUR PARTNER'S PERMISSION, but for me it was just easier to jerk off with the guys.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My main problem with the incident was that it was a married man - anathema in West Hollywood -- and that it was a hookup, not a date. I was too embarrassed to tell anyone about it, even at "What celebrity have you been with" contests at parties. Only Lane and Infinite Chazz knew for many years.

      Delete
    2. Yeah, some men are scum like that. I do know the 80s had this "bisexuals don't exist" rule. (Lots of gatekeeping back then. Some sort of yuppie Thermidor.)

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