Stop Trying to Talk Me into Anal

Has this ever happened to you?

You come into the house at 1:00 am to find your partner and a strange guy asleep in your bed, naked, on their stomachs. 

You rouse your partner, who explains that he brought home a friend to share, but they got tired of waiting.

What's the next thing you do?

Right -- ask the friend to turn over so you can see what he looks like from the front.  Everything that you find attractive in a guy's physique is on the other side.

So I don't understand anal.  Never have, probably never will.  I don't care how many twinks show me their butts -- and a lot of them do.  No matter how much I stress "not into anal," the minute he sets foot in my bedroom, he flops down on the bed and waves his butt at me.

He's facing the wrong way, so I can't see his face, chest, shoulders, cock, anything about him that I found attractive in the first place, and we  can't kiss.  How can you stay aroused with nothing attractive to look at and no kissing, and the guy squealing "Fuck me, Daddy!"?

Or if he throws his legs in the air, which is possible only if he's thin and very limber, he looks ridiculous, he can't breathe well, and you can still barely kiss.

And God forbid he tries to mount you from above.

With all that mishegas, he expects you to stay aroused long enough to put on a condom, smear on lube,  wipe the lube off your hands, find his butt hole (often by inserting a finger, which means wiping your hands again), and push your way in.

And he'll probably try to put pressure on you, which doesn't help with staying aroused:

Flattering, implying that a "real man" would do anal.

"I like a man who knows what he wants and takes it."  (i.e., will top me).

"I like a man who takes charge."  (i.e., will top me).

Shaming, implying that my sexual interests are not "real."

"Oral is ok, but I'd like to have real sex."

"Enough fooling around.  Let's go all the way!"

Commands, trying to force me.

"Do me, Daddy!"  (i.e., top me)

"Take me!"  (i.e., top me)

"Do whatever you want to me!"  (but pull out the handcuffs and watch him backtrack: "No, I meant screw me.")

It's your body and your life.  You have a perfect right to engage in the sexual activities that you enjoy, and refuse those that you do not.  Some people don't like sexual intimacy at all. Some just like to watch.  Some just like to masturbate.  Some just like oral.

You can lead a rich, full life without ever inserting your penis into someone's butt.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to invite these guys home (after checking their ages, of course), in order to see them naked.  From the front.