California


Summer 1985

I move into a 1-room carriage house on Westbourne, near Santa Monica and San Vicente in West Hollywood.  Jobs as an editor at Muscle and Fitness, a human resources assistant at the Community Redevelopment Agency, and an Adjunct Professor at Loyola Marymount College.  My favorite hangouts are the Metropolitan Church, the French Quarter,  and Mugi, the gay Asian bar.

Dates with Marcus, who has a Beneath the Belt Mystery; the Bulgarian bodybuilder who claims to be Michael J. Fox's ex-lover; Huan, the first guy I met at Mugi; and Arman, the first Hispanic guy I dated; plus celebrity Michael J. Fox.  




1985-86

I begin the doctoral program in Comparative Literature at USC, with courses in Renaissance Literature, French, Latin, and German.

After a date with Robin Williams and his boyfriend, I start dating Alan, the Pentecostal porn starWhile I am in Rock Island for Christmas, Alan hooks up with a Norwegian con artist.  We break up, but stay friends.

Alan and I go to Catch One and meet T, the thug on my Sausage List; we go to Mugi and meet the kept boy.

I try to pick up a teen idol at a Greek restaurant, and land a date with the most conservative professor on campus.

I fly to Australia to visit the Cowboy of Kangaroo Island, then spend six weeks in Japan with Alan.  We hookup with Jin the Shinto Priest, and share Minoru, the bed-hopping university student

Back home, I visit Rock Island for a week.

Back in Rock Island, Will and Scott have a wild night with Keanu Reeves, and a celebrity tries to steal my boyfriend, Thanh the Vietnamese student.



1986-87

I move into Alan's 3-bedroom apartment near Plummer Park in West Hollywood.  We go to the gym and MCC together, eat at the French Quarter, and cruise at Mugi.

I date Raul, the cook from East L.A on and off for the next two years. In November, we bankrupt the porn industry.

Back in Rock Island for Christmas, Fred and I hook up with the Ginger Boy.


After briefly breaking up with Raul, I date my celebrity boyfriend through the spring: a Valentine's Day "sharing" of one of his friends; and at a post-Oscar party, we share the Director and his Cute Young Thing.  Then the Celebrity and I break up.

Alan and I visit Tijuana, and meet Bathhouse Boy Alejandro

A week in Rock Island and then to a conference at Notre Dame.  A public encounter with the Catholic Boy

Back in West Hollywood: 
Mr. Muscle Doctor Big Basket

At the end of the summer, Alan moves to Thailand.
I move into a house on Hilldale, off Sunset and San Vicente, with Derek the former fitness model.




1987-88

A hookup or date with Mario in the white room, who tells me about dating Rob Lowe.

I date Rev. Jasper, a Baptist minister from Gardena; share Raul's housemate, Heinz, a crazy German guy; and date Will, the bondage boy with the Sweeney Todd fetish.  We become friends.

I stay in L.A. for Christmas. Date with my doctor, who makes a housecall.  

My ex boyfriend Fred visits with Matt,  the Cute Young Thing who insults both me and Raul. 

In March, I fly to 
Thailand to rescue Alan from being ex-gay.  He soon moves back to West Hollywood.

Date with Celebrity Richard Dreyfuss

I finish my qualifying exams and begin work on my doctoral dissertation, but my terrible dissertation committee forbids me from saying "gay," 

A week in Rock Island.  I go to Rocky High's 10th Year Reunion, and drive to Normal, Illinois to hook up with mgrade school math teacher.

Back in West Hollywood, 4th of July barbecue, Alan tells us about the time he was arrested

In August, Alan moves to Paris, and Fred and Matt move to Claremont, California (Fred tells about his hookup with Ronald Reagan Jr.).


1988-89

An unwelcome houseguest claims to be Ronald Reagan's ex-lover; I hook up with Cesar Romano; I met the cowboy of Sunset Boulevard, and share him with my roommate Derek

My terrible dissertation committee requires that I "pick up Russian."  I take a job in Turkey.

Election Day Hookup: The Romanian Hustler at the Gay Asian Bar.

Marcus tells about his hookup with one of the Hollywood Squares

Christmas in Rock Island.

I move to Ankara, Turkey, for a job as an English instructor (the Turkish bodybuilder).  In February, I visit Alan in Paris.  We share the cop Alan cruises.

In May, I 
return to West Hollywood (with a trip to Tel Aviv on the way, and a Sausage Sighting: the Baptist Preacher on the Plane).  I leave USC without without writing my dissertation, and begin dating Lane (Lane and his Trophy Boy).  We are together until around 1997.

My housemate Derek tells about his date with the pop star David Cassidy.

Back in Rock Island for two weeks: 
My sister gets married: Picking Up the Best Man at My Sister's Wedding; sausage sighting of the contractor remodeling my parents' kitchen.

In West Hollywood, I get a terrible editorial job at the  Getty Consternation Institute.  



1989-90

Lane and I scandalize the Orthodox Cute Young Thing

We stay in West Hollywood for Christmas.

Derek and I share his ex-boyfriend, the Naked Man in the Bathtub; a guy at church who has a new lover every weekLane brings home a sleazoid; I have a date with celebrity Jeff MacKay

Back to Rock Island for a week, and then Lane and I look for penises in Poland.

In August, I move into Lane's apartment on Hacienda, near La Cienega and Sunset in West Hollywood.  Our favorite hangouts are Beth Chaim Chadashim, the gay synagogue; the French Quarter; and the Faultline, a leather bar.



1990-91

I try to become a freelance writer, and take classes in Biblical Hebrew at UCLA ("How Are You?" is Not a Question).

In November, I see the Rocky Horror Picture Show for the first time.

Back in Rock Island for Christmas, Dick and I meet the same  Ginger Boy. that Fred and I hooked up with four years ago.

I meet Lane's friend Randall,  the Bear with the Pierced Penis

In March, Lane's date with Batman, Robin, and the Joker, and a visit to San Francisco (my first time).

I become friends with Cesar Romero.  He tells about his hookup with the entire male cast of I Love Lucy, and about his hookup with Desi Arnaz Jr.


A week in Rock Island (The Promised Land of Gigantic Penises); then Lane and I visit Paris, Brussels, and Amsterdam.  In Paris, Alan sends us In search of the Lapp Penis.

In August, I move to N
ashville, into an apartment on the West End, near the Parthenon.


1991-92

I take classes in Biblical Hebrew at Vanderbilt Divinity School, and work as an adjunct professor at Middle Tennessee State University.

Hookups: the Tennesee redneck ( Frozen Custard and Gay Bashing); the Medieval Knight who didn't want to be outed; the country-western star; and Larry ( discover Larry's fetish; Larry is spanked by an Alabama boy)

In December, I 
move back to West Hollywood.  No time to go to Rock Island for Christmas. Lane tells the story of the Cute Young Thing of Tel Aviv


Back in West Hollywood, I take classes an acting and stand up comedy, and try to work as a translator. I meet Ryan the Gay Dwarf.  We go on The Worst Date in West Hollywood History

 A week in Rock Island.  Then Lane and I go to Paris, Brussels, and Amsterdam, and track down the gay baron of Eindhoven.

Back in West Hollywood, I get a job teaching Gay 101 at Juvenile Hall



1992-93

Lane and I date the teenage beach boy, and almost date the teenage lawnboy; I sneak Chazz into his boyfriend's bedroom.  

How we invented sex parties.

Election Day Hookup: Alan's ex.

Thanksgiving and Christmas in Rock Island

At the synagogue, Gershom asks to "practice on me" before his first date with a Gentile.

We go to Las Vegas, and to visit Fred and Matt for the weekend. Matt tells about his first night with Fred and his brother.

Lane and I land a date with the waiter in a Mexican restaurant.

At Passover, Will tells about his hookup with Peter Fonda.

We fly to London for a gay Jewish conference:  Stranded on The Isle of Dogs  On the way back, I visit Alan in Norfolk, Virginia, and meet Tarik, who Alan and his partner fix me up with as a substitute for "sharing.".  Alan tells about the time he picked up a father and son in Hong Kong. Tarik tells about his frist time with a white guy, a "blue-eyed demon."

A week in Rock Island for my brother's second wedding, and it's back to West Hollywood, where I get a job an architectural assistant at Gruen Associates



1993-94

I take classes in architecture at UCLA

Stories: Lane tells about his three-way with his boyfriend and his brother;  Matt tells about having sex with the bartender, on his knees behind the bar

Lane and I begin cruising separately:  The Silverlake Stud; our hook up with the Eskimo.

Sick on Thanksgiving.

Back in Rock Island for Christmas, I re-unite with Brother Byron, the Church Treasurer 

Our Disneyland date with Infinite Chazz; our multiracial four-way; I bring home a teen hustler.

Singer-songwriter Enrique goes home with Will the Bondage Boy

March: C
onference in Atlanta

Infinite Chazz is dating Kris, a 19-year old ginger boy who helps me get a sausage sighting of Christopher Atkins;  Why Infinite Chazz Broke Up with the Ginger Boy

I am laid off from Gruen Associates.  Lane and I visit Spain, and hook up with Ramon from Barcelona and his roommate.

After a week in Rock Island, I return to West Hollywood and go to work as a job counselor.


1994-95

Randall tells about hooking up with three celebrities at once, including Groucho Marx, and we take Marshall the Virgin to his first bear party.

Back in Rock Island for Christmas, I discover that my parents still have a picture of me and a girl.

 Lane's Boyfriend and Infinite Chazz hit it off; the last half of my scary date with the teenage lawnboy

In April, 
I visit Alan and his partner Sandy in Washington DC, and put on a live sex show for them.

Infinite Chazz is dumped by Mark-Paul Gosselaar.

At Gay Pride, Levi tells about his date with a star of "The Dick Van Dyke Show."; and Randall tells about competing with Dick Sargent over a Disney Adventure Boy

My parents are moving to Indiana, so we travel crosscountry to Rock Island to pick up my stuff: The Great Redneck Roundup of 1995: 20 Guys in 20 Days.  One of our hookups is the Nebraska Cornhusker.

In August, Lane and I move to San Francisco.  We get a 2-bedroom apartment off 8th and Judah, in "the Avenues": San Francisco is still gay heaven.




1995-96

I get a job as an administrative assistant at McCracken Architects, and study chemistry at San Francisco City College.

The leatherman who never left South of Market

We stay in San Francisco for Christmas.

David's first sexual experience, at a gas station in Arkansas.

Hookups: the Politician (Fantasy Hookup #3); Drake the bear artist shares his new twink boyfriend; a street hookup with the guy pushing a Shopping Cart Up Castro Street

Drake introduces me to Corbin, the gym rat with the Mortadella+  We become gym buddies.

Back to L.A. for the Oscar Party. Lane decides to stay.

Lane and I search for the Best Gay Neighborhood  in America.

I visit Indianapolis, then Norfolk, Virginia to visit Alan. Tarik takes me to North Carolina.

I move into my own apartment, a third-floor walkup on 14th, about a mile from the Castro Street Station  I get a part-time job at the San Francisco AIDS Foundation, where I meet David. We will be best friends for the next year: David picks up The Bible Boy of Castro StreetCorbin, David, and I hook up with Brad Pitt.



1996-97

I take classes in sociology, history, and chemistry at San Francisco State University, and apply to Ph.D. programs.

Hookups: David hooks up with the homeless kid I pick up a sales clerk in the restroom at Macy'sI share the slave boy of Castro Street; election day hookup with the City Councilman.

In October, my
 date with the vampire.  Kevin and I date for the next 10 months.4. Five Three-Ways with Kevin the Vampire.

Stories: Drake tells about his hookup with Tony CurtisKevin tells about his date with Satanwhile street cruising, Corbin picks up the Edwardian with the Footlong and the Fetishes


I stay in San Francisco for Christmas; 
David and I share Santa Claus.

Hookups: I go home with the Amazing Invisible Boy David meets Karol, who pulls it out; my Hookup with the Martian;  A Quiet Night in Gay Heaven

Trip to L.A. for the Oscar Party

Matt, Fred's ex, starts renting himself out.

Kevin insists that I stay in San Francisco, so I 
apply to teach at an Orthodox Jewish high school and take classes at San Francisco State: On My Knees in My Teaching Assistant's Office: Kevin the Vampire begins dating my teaching assistant, Seth.

A week in West Hollywood (Jester, the Blind Boy with the Footlong.

Lane and I visit Paris, Amsterdam, and Lithuania.

The Gilroy Garlic Festival with David. I wake up to a straight boy in my bed.  

In August, I m
ove to New York: Trapped in a dorm with kids, I meet Jesse the 17-year old freshman.  We go on my most embarrassing date, with the most insulting ending.


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