My Boyfriend and My Satanist Ex-Boyfriend at Thanksgiving Dinner: A Kelvin/Keefe Adventure

 

"Thanks again for inviting me to Thanksgiving dinner with your family," Kelvin, son of world-famous megachurch pastor Eli Gemstone and youth pastor at the Salvation Center,  told his boyfriend Keefe as the "Welcome to Richmond Hill" sign appeared.  It was an elegant suburb of Savannah, new-looking, with trendy shops and cool-sounding restaurants like the Himalayan Curry Cafe.

"Well, you invited me to dinner with the Gemstones last year,"  Keefe, a reformed Satanist turned assistant youth pastor, said.  "So it's only fair to make you endure my family's craziness.  Have you been studying the family tree?"

"I have it memorized.  Your Mama, Beth.  Don't ask about your Daddy.  Your sister Liz, age 45, and her husband Henry.  She's a child psychologist, and he's a dentist. Henry's son from his first marriage, Austin, who teaches high school English, and his wife...um..."

"Becky."

"Right, Becky.  Liz and Henry have another son, Jimmy, age 8.  Boy, I hope our heart-healthy green bean casserole will be enough."

"It will be fine.  No one in my family eats heart-healthy anyway."

"Ok, who else...Your uncle might be coming.  He's gay, but you only found out a couple of years ago.  He was closeted when you were growing up."  He paused.  "You don't mind letting them think that you're just the assistant youth pastor? I'm not ashamed of us or anything...it's just...well, I'm a Gemstone."  

"I don't mind," Keefe said, lying a little.  It took the family years to accept him -- his sister still didn't like to talk about it much -- and now he had to hide?  Pretend that the love of his life was a buddy?  It felt wrong.  

But Kelvin was always skittish.  He didn't even realize that he was gay until he was over 30. Everyone else knew the moment they saw him in one of his flamboyant outfits.  Keefe suspected that he would prefer to identify as a masculine-presenting demiboy, but they could save the gender-identity conversation for later.  Much, much later.

The full story is on Righteous Gemstones Beefcake and Boyfriends

Gideon moves out of the friend zone: A Gideon x Keefe romance

 

"This is it," Gideon Gemstone told himself as he stood at the entrance of Woodpecker's Carpentry, watching the workers inside, and trying not to be noticed.  "Enough stalling.  You make your move now, or forget about it."

Suddenly a burly middle-aged man in a blue worker's suit appeared. "Hello.  I'm Bishop, the owner.  Can I help you with something?"

"I was just admiring the wood carvings.  I like that Grinch in a Santa Claus suit, and the bobble-head Trump...."  Thinking fast, he added. "But I was really looking for a birthday present for my Granddad.  Eli Gemstone -- you probably heard of him."

"The pastor at the Salvation Center? Sure, half my crew goes there, or watches the Praise Be to He hour on Sunday mornings. He's retired, isn't he? Who's the preacher now?"

"Jesse Gemstone.  I'm his son, Gideon."

He chuckled.  "How about that!   We're having a run on Gemstones today.  Your Uncle Kelvin was in earlier, probably shopping for the same thing.  He was talkin' up a storm with our new guy, Keefe."

Uncle Kelvin!  Gulp -- maybe it was too late.

For two years, Uncle Kelvin had been bringing Keefe to family dinners, barbecues, Christmas parties, everything: the hottest guy Gideon had ever seen. with shoulder-length blond hair, a short beard, an incredibly muscular chest inscribed faintly with a 666, a remnant of his former Satanism that made him even hotter.  

Were Kelvin and Keefe boyfriends?  The evangelical "don't ask, don't tell" policy meant that they would pretend to be just good buddies, regardless.  Even their social media pages were ambiguous.  But what if they were?  Being screwed by a guy who had screwed his uncle!  Forbidden romance, with a hint of incest -- could he get much hotter?  Gideon began fantasizing about Keefe -- a lot.

Then Keefe announced on his Instagram that he was moving out of the Gemstone compound. Two days later, that he was no longer working as assistant youth pastor: he had returned to his old job as a carpenter.  Obviously they had broken up -- if they were ever boyfriends in the first place. A perfect time for Gideon to move in!

Suddenly Gideon realized that the Burly Carpenter was staring at him, expecting him to say something.  "Sure, I know Keefe.  He used to be the assistant youth pastor at the Salvation Center.  I'll bet Uncle Kelvin wanted to commission a gift for Granddad.  Hey, maybe we could go in on a gift together.  Could I talk to him?"

"I'll go get him." Burly retreated to the work floor.  A moment later, Keefe appeared -- incredibly hot in a work shirt that left his arms and shoulders bare.  He smiled...a good sign, right?  "Hi, Gideon.  How's the family doing?"

The full story is on Righteous Gemstones Beefcake and Boyfriends

Groom #1 or Groom #2: A Kelvin/Keefe/ ___ Story

 

 Keefe tried to gulp down the butterflies in his stomach.  It was now or never.  They were watching a true crime documentary on Netflix, just wearing pajama bottoms, cans of grape soda on the coffee table.  Kelvin's tongue was blue.  The least romantic moment imaginable, unless you counted the time he got food poisoning and was throwing up all night.  They weren't even cuddling.  But the lack of romance was the only thing that kept him from losing his nerve.

When the show ended, his boyfriend Kelvin, a youth minister at the famous megachurch run by his family, the world-famous Gemstones, turned off the tv.  He noticed Keefe watching him.    "Oh, sorry, did you want to watch something else?"

"No. Just leave it off.  I need to talk to you for a minute."

Kelvin turned to face him.  "What's up ?"

Keefe stared.  The words he wanted to say wouldn't come out.  Instead he found himself sayings something else. "You are so beautiful.  I've seen you every day for three years, but it never goes away.   I'll tell you a secret.  Remember how I used to get tongue-tied and say things that didn't make much sense?  People thought I was a little impaired because of the drugs, but actually I was trying to talk while looking at you.  Even now I sometimes forget what I want to say, because all I can think of is how incredibly beautiful you are, and how I want to be kissing you, and now I'm rambling and you think I'm a complete idiot."  

The full story is on Rigtheous Gemstones Beefcake and Bonding

"We Have Your Boys": A Kelvin and Keefe Fan Fiction

Kelvin, son of the famous megachurch pastor Eli Gemstone, paced, checked his cell phone, and paced again.  His boyfriend Keefe left at 8:00 am to go rollerblading with their brother-in-la w BJ.  They went roller-blading every Friday, a sort of bonding time and chance to get away from the Gemstone drama.  Except they were always back by 10:00.   It was now after 2:00.  No calls, no texts, and Kelvin's texts to him went unanswered. 

"Keefe is a grown man," he told himself.  "He doesn't need to check in with me.  Maybe he and BJ decided to go shopping and have lunch."

He paced some more.  "Maybe his cell phone died, so he can't call."  When he bought Keefe the cell phone, he considered installing "friend tracker" app, but that would be too much control.  Keefe moved in two years ago with nothing; everything he owned was a gift or came from the joint checking account. Gulp.  Maybe he felt like a kept boy, trapped in the mansion, an extension of the Gemstones. Could he have....left?

No way!  Kelvin was not going to check the joint account, to see if Keefe made any big withdrawals.  Even thinking it was ridiculous.

The full story is on Righteous Gemstones Beefcake and Boyfriends

Kelvin Sees a Ghost: A Kelvin/Keefe Fan Fiction

 

This story takes place shortly after the "blink and you miss it" sex scene in The Righteous Gemstones Episode 2.6.  

Kelvin didn't understand what was happening to him.  He was the son of world-famous mega-church pastor Eli Gemstone.  He appeared before 13,000 people at the Salvation Center every week, plus the millions watching him on tv.  He was a role model for thousands of Christian youth.  And hadn't he always stressed the importance of keeping your body pure?  You work out, you eat right, and you stay away from sexual temptation.  Why else would he surround himself with a God Squad of muscular men? 

And Keefe, his best friend, housemate, and assistant youth pastor for the last year?  Of course they loved each, as Christians; they called each other "Brother."  But this was so much different from the love he felt for his real brother and sister.  What did it mean?

The full story is on Righteous Gemstones Beefcake and Boyfriends

Boyfriend or Sex Toy? A Kelvin and Keefe Fan Fiction

 

This story takes place a few days after the events in the "dressing room" sequence in Season 2, Episode 6.

As Keefe walked into One Broad, a light, airy brunch place on Broad Street in Charleston, he saw that his besties, Prawn and Lucille, were already there.  It was nice to see his long-term best friend and his new sassy friend in the same place.

"What's cookin', Charlie?"  Prawn asked, leaning up to kiss him on both cheeks.  

"Nothin' buzzin', Cousin," Keefe answered.  He sat next to him, across from Lucille: more room.  Lucille was a bit portly, but Prawn (the origin of his nickname long forgotten) was a wispy little thing.  Keefe could wrap both arms all the way around his body with room to spare.  A big heart, though.  (And a big cock.)

The full story is on Righteous Gemstones Beefcake and Boyfriends

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