New York


I am enrolled in the doctoral program at Setauket University and living in a graduate student apartment on campus with three straight roommates.

Sept: Using gay panic to try to get rid of the obnoxious roommate); my date with Jaan, the  Estonian mountain climber; Conrad, who came to my room to fix my computer.

October: Hookup with the Lebanese guy who wanted to hang out.

Nov: Dustin invites me to the New York Bondage Club)

Dec: Yuri, the gay Russian who claims to be straight, comes out; why  my nickname is Boomer.    I stay in New York for Christmas.

Feb: Yuri's first real date: The guy who just wanted to kiss

March: Yuri and I visit San Francisco and West Hollywood.

April: A Date with the Nastiest Guy in the World

May: Indianapolis and Rock Island for Rocky High's 20-year Reunion.

June: Visit to Estonia, Russia, and Finland with Jaan and Yuri; Jaan chooses between usn Estonia, we share the Swedish bodybuilder who looks like a serial killer

July: Conference in Montreal: wing man to a Muscle God; the truth about the Formosan Penis.

Aug: I move into a two-bedroom apartment on 13th Street in the East Village with Edward the Art Appraiser.


I commute from the East Village to Setauket, often spending the night with Yuri.  

Blake the Opera Buff and Joe the Regular Guy

Nov: Yuri and I go to weekly bear parties on Long Island; hookup with Carl, who didn't want to be interviewed

Dec: Back in Indiana, for Christmas, a hookup with a guy who lives only a few blocks from my parents' house; West Hollywood for New Year's: the One Thing Kerry Wants in a Guy

Jan: Tucson, Arizona to visit Infinite Bob

Feb:Yuri and his boyfriend find me a gay hangoutYuri cruises at a Russian Orthodox seminary.

March: Conference in Boston: the Homophobic Student in the Shower.

April: Yuri and I share the unhung hippie

May: Joe and I go to upstate New York to visit the Muscle Bear who is not into sharing.

 June:  Summer in Paris.  Date with Tomor the Mongolian Shaman and Prasert from the Thai restaurant.

July: Yuri visits.  We travel to Spain to  search for the world's biggest penises, and in the Basque country, I am Third Wheel to a Muscle God.

Aug: Edward and I share his Boyfriend for Pay;  the  Homophobic DemonThe Colonial Boy's First TimeBarry and the Creepy Old Guy.  


I begin working as an adjunct at Hofstra University, in addition to taking classes and working as a teaching assistant at Setauket University.

Oct: Ozzie refuses to leave my room until it stops raining; Yuri and I share a Korean gym rat.

Jared, the HIV positive BDSM Birthday Boy .

Dec: In Rock Island for Christmas, Fred tells about The White Knight and the Jester; My Sunday school teacher's stripper sons.

Jan: Indianapolis for New Year's: Matt the Bartender and the Y2K Bug.

Feb:Stuck with a student at Jamaica Station Liam gives me a present for his 18th birthday.

March: West Hollywood for the Oscar Party: hookup with Nate Richert, Harvey from Sabrina the Teenage Witch. 

April: Yuri and I visit Zack in Providence, who tells about about his night with the Prince of Sweden
Sausage sighting of Dr. Chester, the ex-wrestler with the Kovbasa.

May: I finish my comprehensive exams and begin my doctoral dissertation.

June: Indianapolis and a day at Manville Camp (Nephew Sausage Sighting #1: Ethan).

July: Conference in Durban, South Africa: Quest for the Bushman Penis; and Sibu, the Hottest Guy in the World


Yuri has moved to Florida, so I have to commute from Manhattan three times a week.

Sept: date with Mario, the teen model and Shen the Chinese History Major

Nov:  My roommate Edward tries to "make"  my boyfriend; On Election Day, I break every rule of gay cruising.

Dec: Yuri and I spend Christmas in Rock Island: we teach my nephew the gay Facts of Life; we go to Indianapolis for New Year's.

Jan: I date the Filipino sociology major

March: Jermaine, the biggest guy on my Sausage List; eight job interviews ("Are you ever mistaken for gay?").

April: I fly to Bemidji, Minnesota: Fred and the Icelandic Photographer

May: Delaware: Jermaine's Uncle's 50th Birthday party; dissertation defense, Ph.D. awarded.

June: Rock Island: attempted hookup up with the the pizza delivery boy;  A week in Indianapolis.

Aug:  I can't find a teaching job in a gay neighborhood, so Yuri suggests that I come live with him in Florida. On the way, I encounter the Amish boy in red bikini briefs.  At a housewarming party, Kevin the bodybuilder tells the story of the teenage underwear thief.

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