There are some definite problems with having a fetish for men in suits.
1. They are garments designed erase any hint of the man's physicality. Women's outfits show curves and cleavage, and bare arms and backs, but men's outfits make their bodies invisible (obviously some sexist stereotyping going on). So unless they're very buffed or aroused, you have no idea what's going on under the gabardine.
2. Half the time, when you think you see a bulge, it's not actually their cock.
3. Men generally wear suits when they are busy with work or at a formal event, where they're unable or unwilling to cruise, and might not even recognize your interest. So it's hard to meet them that way.
4. If you do manage to meet them while they're in a suit, 90% of the time they'll show up for the date dressed "casually," in a bicep-displaying shirt and bulge-displaying jeans
5. If they do show up in a suit for some reason -- they came directly from work, or you're going to a party at Andrew Lloyd Weber's house -- I guarantee that they will take it off and carefully hang it up before beginning any sexual act. No way this is happening.
More after the break.
6. And if he does, through some miracle, allow you to go down on him while he's wearing his suit, the reality is not nearly as hot as the fantasy. Have you ever tried sucking a cock with a giant belt, a zipper, some buttons, and miscellaneous gabardine flopping into your face? It's not pleasant.
7. With jeans and a t-shirt, you can rip it off while kissing. The only problem might be getting his pants all the way off his feet without kicking and looking ridiculous. But taking a suit off is a major job. There are things to unbutton, things to untie. Hangers are necessary to avoid wrinkling. There are little-known accessories, like cufflinks and garters, that make the job harder. It will be a miracle if you're still aroused after all that.
8. And the whole job starts over in the morning.
9. Suit-and-tie porn is hard to find. Mostly you have naked guys and an assurance that they used to be wearing a suit.
With all those drawbacks, and the thousands of casually dressed men available. I wonder why I even bother.
10. Oh,yeah. The incredible hotness.
2. Half the time, when you think you see a bulge, it's not actually their cock.
The only thing you can do is what I call Mapplethorping. And you're really limited to what you can do.
ReplyDeleteGreat thing about being born in a western state: Cowboy outfits are easier have sex in. I can just wear a cowboy hat, jeans, and boots, and maybe a bolo tie.
ReplyDeleteAll you really need is the hat to keep up the cowboy fantasy during sex. Or maybe just the boots.
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