5 Craigslist Hookups in One Day

Plains, October 2017

Craigslist is the bargain-basement of hookup venues, full of crazy downlow guys who think it's still the pre-Stonewall dark ages.
"Are you a cop?"
"There was someone on the sidewalk, so I was afraid to get out of my car."
"I haven't done anything bisexual before, and..."
"Will you screw me while I'm wearing my black panties and high heels, and tell me I'm a naughty girl?"

Plus they're usually over 100 and extraordinarily out of shape, they show up half-drunk, and they want to watch straight porn while I go down on them.

But the other major hookup apps are not active during the daytime, and last Tuesday I was home all day and in the mood, having not been with anyone except Bob for two weeks, so I resorted to a craiglist ad: "Any age, race, size, but no crazy closet types, no endless questions about exactly what we will be doing.  It's not hard to understand: you come in, sit down, and unzip."

To my surprise, I hit paydirt.  Five guys, each hotter than the last (if you arrange them that way), most not even crazy.

1. Mid-thirties, smooth chest, hung about 7.5", uncut.  Said he worked in dry wall, whatever that is, and was waiting for the rain to let up.

2. Deonte, who I've been with before.  Short black guy, 23, very tight muscles but thin -- I could put my hand around his waist!  At least 8".

3. Trent, mid-20s, gym rat, smooth chest, shaggy hair, average size.  In and out in five minutes, but a memorable five minutes.

4, Jay, age 19, from Iowa, "in town visiting friends."  Says "I've never done this before"  -- yeah, right.  Very tall, smooth chest, a little belly, very long cock.  I went down on him, but realized that he liked nipple play and kissing.  And going  down on me.

"This was my first time doing that with a guy," he said

I looked him up on Facebook.  He really is 19, from Iowa, with a girlfriend.

5. Joey, 21, music major, gay, not bi or downlow, smooth chest, 7".  We immediately started kissing.  He wanted me to do interfemoral.  Unfortunately, an hour after #4, I couldn't oblige, so I went down on him,  We exchanged phone numbers.

It was only 2:00 pm, but I took the ad down.  My jaw was getting tired.